INNER MONOLOGUES: JOB HUNTING

May 22, 2015
interview_thought

Wearing denim on denim was a good life choice, drinking Nescafe gold was not.

Urgh. Pinterest – people get paid to pin on the reg. I got paid to pin on the reg. Bizcommunity. Click.

Flash flash.

Okay eyes, that’s a message. If I could have a 15 minute nap on this keyboard that would be great. Or isn’t that a message? I can’t be the only one that sees imaginary blinking lights in the corner of my eyes. S/O to technology.

Dark blue? Tinder? Ew.

Oh snap, gmail. Probably to-doist app reminding me of the ten things I scheduled for yesterday and still need to do. To-do list. Eh. Gymming and post-avo-ing instead of adulting was so worth it. Eat your veggies, do your squats and don’t let boys be mean to you. I need to find new workout music today. YAS. Who the eff-bomb ever completes a to-doist to-do lists anyway?

DEAR LORD. It’s THEM. THEY MESSAGED ME.

Would you like to come for a face-to-face meeting with insert-enigma-here later this week?

(insert angelic voices aaaaah-ing in harmony, cue glitter falls and minor heart pulpitations)

Of-fekking-course-I-would!

Okay breathe. It’s only one of your favourite brands in like LIFE and they want to hang out and talk shop for an hour. Take that negative nancy! Positive thoughts win all the things. God that meme is still my favourite. What am I going to wear? What do they wear? When can I go shopping? Fek why’s my budget so tight. Damn you Era and your beautiful electro and pricey tequila. Totes could have bought a pair of block heels instead. The maroon booties will have to do.
What are they going to ask me? What’s my favourite piece in my portfolio and why? HTML. CSS. Words. Words. Colour. Prints.

I should probably reply – like ASAP.

Breathe.

Hi, I’d absolutely love to come in for an interview with you this week.

Type type type type. Be brief. Be sharp. Be excited.

Send.

Phew. So those maroon booties. Back to pinterest we go. Edgey interview look. Search. UUUURGH. Boring blazer. Boring blazer. Boring blazer. Let’s not play the I’m-bang-average game. All black er’thang? With a pop of maroon – er’bady loves marsala. Let’s do marsala. That name still makes me feel like I’m wearing a curry.

Beep. New meeting request.

Don’t forget to paint your nails. Straight hair? Curls? Up-do? How much time am I going to need to get ready? Top ten interview questions and answers. Search.
I wish I’d spent two hours more in the sun on Saturday. Ghosts are the anti-chic.

Ping. Joe liked my lengthy facebook status about fight club. Capitalism. The system. Quit your job. Claim your humanity. Bukowski.

Statistics. 16 likes.

I should probably wear the matte plum lipstick.

Accept meeting request. 

“Eff off with your sofa units and serine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let… let’s evolve, let the chips fall where they may.”

Chuck, you legend.

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